The Inward Journey

As first responders I find that often we focus on others so much so that we neglect our own self-care.  We give so much of ourselves in service to our communities that there is nothing left for us or our families once we retire.  This job is a calling, and we often stay in the job longer than we should because we love what we do and being a first responder is a large part of our identity.  It’s who we are.

Like many reading this, I am a statistic.  I love being a police officer and focused all my energy into my career for the first 10 years.  After an exciting first 10 years, I was working one night as the night shift commander looking at a computer screen fresh off a divorce.  Not only had my marriage failed, but it also seemed my career had stalled after a couple failed promotional processes. 

Webster defines discipline as orderly or prescribed conduct or pattern of behavior; self-control, but I like how former Alabama football head coach Nick Saban describes discipline.  Coach Saban says that “discipline is defined as doing what you’re supposed to do, the way you’re supposed to do it, the way it’s supposed to get done. Do the right thing, the right way, all the time.”  Coach goes on to talk about self-discipline and says, “here’s something I’m supposed to do that I really don’t want to do.  Can I make myself do it?  And over here is something you know you’re not supposed to do but you want to do it.  Can I keep myself from doing it?”  I like how Coach Saban illustrates discipline because he is talking about feelings versus choice.  We all are going to do what we FEEL like doing, but can we CHOOSE to do the things we need to do to be successful?

Now back to my night shift computer screen story.  I decided that in that moment to look inward and start a journey.  While our profession requires us to serve our communities, I decided that the community was going to get the best version of me, and I needed a goal in order to focus.  Luckily, I had always been into personal fitness, so it seemed natural to gravitate to that area of my life.  Now saying all that, my experience and knowledge of fitness was learned behavior.  Others in the gym (where everyone is an expert), old high school football weight routines, and just sort of floating through “working out”.  With my newfound goal, I decided that I was going to research MY fitness going forward. 

This began my own inward journey, and I went further beyond fitness looking at nutrition, sleep, financial wellness, and many other dimensions that are found on the typical wellness wheels a simple google search will reveal.  I now have 20 years on the agency and the journey I’ve taken the last 10 years has been both fulfilling and beneficial to my own health.  I completed 75HARD, trained using the Shortcut to Size routine from Dr. Jim Stoppani, ate a Whole30 diet, and tried many other wellness programs. 

This post isn’t a pitch or endorsement for any specific method or program especially the ones I listed.  They are all great in their own way and offer something to take away and add to experiences.  The takeaway from this post is to find your own inward journey.  Find something that you enjoy, that makes you happy, and never stop growing in that endeavor.  We proudly give our lives for the communities we serve, and we also need to enjoy life in the moment.